


The Green-Ey'd Monster

by lahijadelmar



Category: Star Trek: The Original Series
Genre: M/M, Old Married Couple, old married spirk
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-02-12
Updated: 2018-02-12
Packaged: 2019-03-17 05:08:09
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,224
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13652055
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lahijadelmar/pseuds/lahijadelmar
Summary: Spock finds out that Kirk was kissed while imprisoned on Rura Penthe...and that he didn't exactly turn away from it. An exploration of old married!Spirk and the duration of jealousy.Takes place just after the events of The Undiscovered Country. Sexually suggestive stuff, but nothing explicit.





	The Green-Ey'd Monster

**Author's Note:**

> Always wondered how a married Spirk (Spock, specifically) would deal with the Martia kiss if it became public knowledge. I feel it'd only be a matter of time before McCoy said something and let the cat out of the bag, so I thought, why not explore that? For what it's worth I headcanon that every officer has their own quarters even if married, so that would explain Spock having 'his' place and Kirk having 'his' place, etc. I don't think I need to address anything else but I might just be tired and delirious. Regards.

It hadn’t exactly been the build-up to retirement that he’d hoped for. Three months before standing down and they had faced down almost certain death, a murder conviction, a freezing gulag, deflected an assassination attempt, all while he and Spock were in something of an ongoing spat about the Klingon issue. Or rather,  _ he _ was pissed and had been snippy for the past few weeks at a very patient Spock who wanted only for him to see what was best for the situation, for everyone. 

It had taken him awhile to see it that way though, and maybe _ that’s _ why he let Martia kiss him. Maybe that’s why he didn’t pull away. Anyway, it was  _ just _ a kiss, he hadn’t any intention of taking it farther than that- he was just angry and a little vindictive after all, not completely lacking in scruples. He had basically forgotten it had happened (maybe  _ willed _ himself to forget), had allowed himself to go back to daydreaming of spending most of his days on the farmland he and Spock had purchased a couple years back. They’d make a real thing of it now- get the orchards going, maybe make and sell their own jam, be there for Winona as it got harder for her to move around on her own.

He’d miss the  _ Enterprise _ like nothing else, of course, but a new life awaited him now. At least, that was the plan until Bones, under the influence of too much Romulan ale or drunk on the promise of retirement or both of those things together, decided to blurt out mention of that fucking gulag kiss to Spock like it was the most hilarious thing in the world. Under any other circumstances Jim wouldn’t have worried about it that much. He and Spock had been together long enough now, knew each other well enough, to be content and confident of the mutual devotion between them, however...they had only just gotten off the tail end of an extended marital squabble and Jim hadn’t exactly been in the right. What’s more, it was certain Spock would’ve discerned his _ vindictive _ reasons for having kissed someone else.

Spock simply raised an eyebrow ( _ shit _ , he was in trouble) and said nothing else on the matter until Jim followed him into his quarters.

 

“For what it’s worth,  _ she _ kissed  _ me _ ,” Jim said first thing, apropos of nothing. “I was lying there practically...helpless, she just popped up beside my bunk. I couldn’t exactly push her off, could I?”

“ _ Odd _ ,” Spock said as he lit one of the prayer candles on his vanity, likely just for something to do so he didn’t have to look at his traitorous husband. “I don’t  _ recall _ expressing any kind of discomfort with this development. Perhaps you are projecting, Jim.” 

Jim all but rolled his eyes. 

 

“I’m not projecting, I know how you are when you’re mad.” 

“Must I remind you-”

“Oh, god, yes, Vulcan resistance, I  _ know _ ! You still get pissed, Spock, you always have and there’s no point denying it.”

 

Jim had to sit down, arms crossed, all but full on toddler pouting. Spock faced him now, still with that damn eyebrow raised, a mixture of concern and confusion plain to read there in the wake of this behavior.      

 

“You’ve been resistant as of late, ashayam. Did it ever occur to you that if you were to reach out to me you would find your truth?” 

 

Spock was referring, of course, to their mental bond, and he was right. Jim had been keeping things rather gated and frigid between them. Normally thoughts and feelings would flow from one to the other like a calm, relaxed, lazy river because the trust and comfort between them was just that great- no secrets, no shame, nothing to hide. The Klingon debacle had introduced a mental dam of sorts of Jim’s own making. He had just been  _ so angry _ and now he was angry again...because Spock wouldn’t admit to being angry. 

It was all rather silly. What was  _ really _ the matter then?

 

“Your pride is too strong,” Spock gently admonished, taking a seat beside him on the bed where he’d plopped himself down earlier. “And you’ve kept those barriers up too long to dismantle on your own.” 

 

Spock extended a hand to Jim’s cheek in offering and, after a moment, he nodded his consent. It wasn’t out of bitterness to his husband that he hesitated, but a fear of whatever ugliness Spock would see there, all that must have festered during the rage he had nursed long into this whole issue. But then again, didn’t he know better than to think Spock would judge him? 

Talking was nice at times, but there was nothing that really compared to the intimacy of the meld. Matters that might have taken other couples hours to hash out took them no longer than 30 minutes in joined headspace, gathering a deeper and deeper understanding of one another. Jim didn’t know that he’d ever get over the feeling,  _ hoped _ he wouldn’t perhaps. Sure enough, tt seemed all the more euphoric this time when Spock entered. Whatever defenses had been there before Jim ripped away without a second thought and welcomed him in where he’d always belong with open arms.

 

_ I’m sorry...I’m such a bigot, such an old fool… _

 

_ As I have been in my way. What was it you said? ‘Don’t crucify yourself.’ _

 

They parted, but the connection was freely flowing again and the truth Jim had sought was indeed clear now. 

 

“You... _ weren’t _ angry.”

“It would be _ illogical, _ greedy perhaps, to feel jealousy over a stolen kiss, returned in misplaced vindication, when you have given me so much of yourself. We are not in our 30’s anymore, Jim. It has been a long time since the days of pining in private anger as we watched the other in fleeting romance after fleeting romance.”

“I suspect you did more  _ watching  _ than I,” Jim offered with a tired smile. “At your own behest, of course. You could’ve had anyone you wanted.”

Spock nodded, more in acknowledgment of the compliment than agreement. “The one I wanted gave himself to me willingly- perhaps, then, your supposition is correct.”

 

Jim exhaled a breath of blissed out relief and exhaustion and leaned into Spock’s chest as he wrapped his arm around his shoulders.  _ Finally _ , after so long, so many years of running and adventuring they could...well. Find a new adventure. One with less promise of death, perhaps. Jim didn’t much care what the nature of it was so long as Spock was there with him. Hadn’t that always been the case? 

 

“I’ll still give you a make-up blowjob if you want one though,” Jim said after a time, only half joking as he moved his hand to squeeze Spock’s knee. 

He couldn’t see it, but that raised eyebrow of consideration was most certainly there because after a beat Spock replied, “On the condition that you put a pillow beneath your knees. You’ll recall the last time-”

“Yes, I do recall. Thank you.”

 

The last thing Jim wanted to remember was his knees locking up and Bones having to render aid, making a fuss about how they had no business carrying on like two 20-something cadets- especially when he was already pulling down the zipper of his husband’s uniform trousers. 


End file.
